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From "Emmanuel Lecharny (Closed) (JIRA)" <...@directory.apache.org>
Subject [jira] [Closed] (DIR-256) Cosmetic - Grammar on Vision page
Date Wed, 22 Feb 2012 15:55:49 GMT

     [ https://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DIR-256?page=com.atlassian.jira.plugin.system.issuetabpanels:all-tabpanel
]

Emmanuel Lecharny closed DIR-256.
---------------------------------

    
> Cosmetic - Grammar on Vision page
> ---------------------------------
>
>                 Key: DIR-256
>                 URL: https://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DIR-256
>             Project: Directory
>          Issue Type: Task
>          Components: sitedocs
>         Environment: n/a -- web page issue
>            Reporter: Corey Richard
>            Assignee: Alex Karasulu
>            Priority: Trivial
>              Labels: grammar
>   Original Estimate: 0.5h
>  Remaining Estimate: 0.5h
>
> I realize that this will come off as picky, but if it was my page I would want to know.
 In hopes of helping the web pages to appear a bit more polished: 
> On:
> http://directory.apache.org/api/vision.html
> 1)
> "An clear example is the underlying network layer : "
> The colon should not have a space before it, and the sentence should start as "A clear
example".
> 2)
> "OpenDS will use Grizzly, when we will use MINA."
> The second part of the sentence is too clse to "when will we", and it makes the sentence
awkward.  It would probably work out better as:
> "OpenDS will use Grizzly, while we will use MINA."
> (Though, on this point I'm not entirely sure, because the first part of the sentence
is in third person and the second part is in first.  This makes it look like two different
groups are being talked about.  It's confusing because earlier on the page the term "OpenDS"
is talked about as "we".  Just trying to explain it is confusing.)
> Again, I don't mean to be picky simply in order to tear anything or anyone down; I just
don't want the project to be slighted because of confusion on the web page.

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