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From "Halley Pacheco de Oliveira (JIRA)" <derby-...@db.apache.org>
Subject [jira] Commented: (DERBY-1394) Working With Derby - Introduction and prerequisites - Improvements
Date Wed, 21 Jun 2006 21:21:30 GMT
    [ http://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DERBY-1394?page=comments#action_12417191 ] 

Halley Pacheco de Oliveira commented on DERBY-1394:
---------------------------------------------------

Hi Stan,

I'm glad that you liked the changes and the reference to the Owl English site. I committed
the changes and I'm closing this issue.

--halley

> Working With Derby - Introduction and prerequisites - Improvements
> ------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>          Key: DERBY-1394
>          URL: http://issues.apache.org/jira/browse/DERBY-1394
>      Project: Derby
>         Type: Improvement

>   Components: Documentation
>     Versions: 10.2.0.0
>  Environment: DITA-sourced documentation
>     Reporter: Halley Pacheco de Oliveira
>     Assignee: Halley Pacheco de Oliveira
>     Priority: Minor
>      Fix For: 10.2.0.0
>  Attachments: twwdIntro.diff, twwdIntro.diff.html, twwdIntro.html, twwdIntro_2.diff,
twwdIntro_2.diff.html, twwdIntro_2.html, twwdIntro_3.diff, twwdIntro_3.diff.html, twwdIntro_3.html
>
> 1) There is a gramatical error:
> It's written "sections" and not "section":
> "In way of introduction this sections provides a brief description of Derby."
> and should be, in my opinion:
> "In way of introduction this section provides a brief description of Derby."
> 2) DERBY_HOME
> It's written:
> "Note the filesystem path to the Derby installation (referred to as DERBY_HOME)."
> but DERBY_HOME doesn't appear anywhere else in this page, so it is not possible
> to note it in this page. It only appears in the activities pages. By this reason,
> in my opinion, the sentence should be:
> "Note the filesystem path to the Derby installation (referred to as DERBY_HOME) in the
activities sections."
> 3) Commas could be used to make some sentences shorter:
> ===
> - "Derby is a full featured, open source relational database engine that is written and
implemented completely in Java."
> into
> + "Derby is a full featured, open source, relational database engine, that is written
and implemented completely in Java."
> ===
> - "It provides users with a small footprint, standards-based Java database that can be
tightly embedded into any Java based solution."
> into
> + "It provides users with a small footprint, standards-based, Java database, that can
be tightly embedded into any Java based solution."
> ===
> - "In it's default configuration there is no separate database server to be installed
or maintained by the end user."
> into
> + "In it's default configuration, there is no separate database server to be installed
or maintained by the end user."
> ===
> - "This document demonstrates but does not teach the Java, JDBC and SQL presented so
readers wishing a deeper understanding of these topics will need additional reference materials."
> into
> + "This document demonstrates, but does not teach, the Java, JDBC and SQL presented,
so readers wishing a deeper understanding of these topics will need additional reference materials.
> ===
> - "If unsure about the Java or Derby environments installed perform the following steps
before attempting the subsequent activities:"
> into
> + "If unsure about the Java or Derby environments installed, perform the following steps
before attempting the subsequent activities:"
> ===
> - "The output you see may be different from what is shown here because the java -version
command outputs vendor-specific information."
> into
> + "The output you see may be different from what is shown here, because the java -version
command outputs vendor-specific information."
> ===
> - "If the command produced an error or the version listed is not 1.3 or higher please
install a Java development kit before continuing."
> into
> + "If the command produced an error or the version listed is not 1.3 or higher, please
install a Java development kit before continuing."
> ===
> - "From the Downloads page use the link to the 'Latest Official Release' then locate
the bin distribution (e.g. db-derby-10.2.0-bin). Download the file and unbundle the release."
> into
> + "From the Download page use the link to the 'Latest Official Release', then locate
the bin distribution (e.g. db-derby-10.2.0-bin). Download the file and unbundle the release."
> 4) Download the file and unbundle the release.
> Is is not easy to understand what this sentence means. There are two files for the binary
distribution: -bin.zip and -bin.tar.gz
> So the previous sentence could be changed to:
> "From the Download page use the link to the 'Latest Official Release', then locate the
bin distribution (e.g. db-derby-10.1.2.1-bin.zip and db-derby-10.1.2.1-bin.tar.gz). Download
the appropriate file for your platform, '-bin.zip' for Windows or '-bin.tar.gz' for Unix/Linux",
and unzip/untar this file. After decompressing the downloaded file, move the directory created
to the filesystem path choosed to be the root directory of the Derby installation (e.g., move
db-derby-10.1.2.1-bin C:\Derby)

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